


Convection

by bikuai



Series: Condensation [3]
Category: Titanfall (Video Games)
Genre: Character Study, Love, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Pining, Sunsets, Symbolism, i am the pioneer of this ship, i don’t get tired of using that tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2020-11-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:26:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27767470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bikuai/pseuds/bikuai
Summary: Tai can’t fully explain the intricacies of love to BT-7274. Not when the undercurrents of regret are still trying to overturn a choice he made a lifetime long ago.
Relationships: BT-7274 & Tai Lastimosa, Tai Lastimosa/Eli Anderson
Series: Condensation [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2031487
Kudos: 15





	Convection

**Author's Note:**

> Here’s the less angsty fic I promised!
> 
> Writing Tai is very cathartic for me, and I just love the way emotion has been flowing through my works lately. I love him so much.

At the top of the hill, Tai feels like he can brush the sky with his fingertips. Stringy, wispy clouds sail above him, floating away from the retreating sun. It's not yet below the horizon, but the better part of its glare is obscured by the rolling hills in the distance. The sky is pink as rose water near the sun's corona, but the shadowy underbellies of the clouds remind Tai of overripe peaches. He relaxes back onto the grass.

BT is by his side, still as a sentry. The cool breeze doesn't faze him, though his pilot is wearing more layers than usual. A turtleneck hugs each dip and plane of his torso, replacing his Marauder Corps-issued tactical vest. He wears a light jacket on top, its sleeves emblazoned with the SRS prowler. His signature gloves are still present, but he has to keep flexing his fingers to keep them from getting stiff. Tai doesn't mind the cold, even when the wind kicks up and his ears get numb.

"Lovely sunset, isn’t it?" He asks the Vanguard.

BT uses his auxiliary optic to look down at the captain while his main eye stays focused on the sunset. "Define lovely."

A laugh bubbles up from Tai. He's grown used to the blunt responses from BT, but that doesn’t make them any less amusing. Tai takes it as a joke on the brisk weather and leaves it at that. Wouldn’t be the first time BT gave a shot at dry humor; it’s something he picked up from his pilot.

But when Tai notices the optic still watching him expectantly, he speaks up again. "Is there something wrong, BT?"

"Negative." A pause. "But I would value your response to an inquiry I have."

"Go ahead, I'm an open book," Tai says, arms spread out on the grass.

BT hesitates again, which is more than uncommon for the Vanguard. Tai watches him intently as he kneels in an oddly human fashion. His brilliant teal eye centers on his pilot.

"How would one define the experience of love?"

Tai resists the urge to snort at the question. Instead, he pulls himself into a sitting position, faces BT, and thinks for a long, tense moment. He doesn't admit to loving or falling in love with many people, but there was a time when he knew what it was like. He remembers those brief and fleeting encounters with intimacy and swallows. "Well, it's a combination of a lot of complex, sometimes conflicting, feelings. And it's different for everyone. But I guess...shit, I don't know, lemme think..."

Tai rubs a hand over the back of his neck, weighing his next words. Experiencing love and describing it are two very different things. He tries to come up with an explanation, but all he can think of is the warmth of his skin whenever they were in the same room, and the heat of their infatuation whenever they were alone. He sighs, just imagining the fun Eli would poke at him if he knew how tongue-tied he gets when it comes to their relationship. BT waits patiently for Tai to resume.

"Love is a robust emotion. It doesn't just sit and simmer, yeah? It's like a fire. And the fuel to the fire is admiration, attraction, devotion…those types of things.” The words rumble out, impressing Tai with their elegance and simplicity. He tilts his head up to the coral-hued clouds as a realization washes over him. “But it’s more than just the feeling of wanting one another. There’s gotta be something that keeps all that passion in check.”

Tai doesn’t lose steam, riding on the wave of his epiphany. “What I’m saying is that what divides love from lust is respect. You can’t love someone if you don’t respect them and their decisions. It might hurt, but love is like that sometimes. You can’t really control it.”

BT blinks at him.

“I guess I went off on a bit of a tangent there, eh?”

Silence resumes, broken only by the whirring of BT’s joints as he turns to face the sunset again.

"Pilot, have you ever been in love?"

This question catches Tai off guard. He knows the answer but he's never expected to have to say it out loud. He had put away those fears and the accompanying half-written confessions a long time ago. Before the war turned in the Militia’s favor, before he was assigned BT, before he became captain. “Simpler times” as Eli had jokingly put it. Tai lies back into the grass with a sigh.

“I was once, but that was a while ago,” he admits quietly, a breeze brushing the words from his lips. 

Tai can practically hear the calculations running through BT’s processor. Curious as he is, the Vanguard doesn’t press for more. Instead, he shifts his weight in an awkward motion and lays their conversation to rest.

“Pilot, I recommend we return to base,” BT says, opening the cockpit hatch. “By my estimations, we will be late to ‘chow time’ if we do not leave within eight minutes and thirty-two seconds.”

“Alright, alright,” Tai says as he pulls himself to his feet. The sky is beginning to look more purple than pink, and the chill of the night has started seeping into his bones. Tai shakes out a few stretches, curses himself for getting old, then steps up into the cockpit. “Let’s get going.”

BT rises to his full height and begins the trek back to base. Tai relaxes into the seat, the weariness of their long day catching up to him. Despite their brief reprieve on the hill, there’s still a war echoing beyond the horizon. He can never forget that, but for a few precious moments, it is out of the forefront of his mind. Hitting a button on one of the side panels, he enlarges the video feed from BT’s auxiliary optic, which is pointed at the lazy stream of clouds above them. It reminds him of Harmony and of sitting outside to watch the evening settle in. That was before he had someone to share the habit with.

BT’s chassis rocks gently as he descends the hill. There are no words, but Tai can feel him searching through their neural link, a feather-light pressure on his mind.

“Is something wrong?” He asks.

BT halts his probing and withdraws. “Negative. I was completing an assessment of your emotional well-being. I realize I may have been intrusive with my earlier questions, but that was not my intention.”

Tai laughs, full and mirthful, coaxing BT’s consciousness back into the link. “It’s alright, no harm done, yeah? I was expecting you to ask about it sometime or another.”

BT considers that as he brushes past trees and steps over rocks. “I am glad you trust me with this knowledge.”

“And I’m glad I have you to trust. I’d never hear the end of it if I told Briggs or Cooper or anyone else in the SRS for that matter,” Tai says, shaking his head. Just the thought of his fellow pilots hassling him about his love life is enough to give him a headache. He sighs. “Love is a dangerous thing, BT. I wouldn’t bother with it if I were you.”

The Vanguard gives a contemplative hum. “Noted.”

They continue in silence all the way back to base. The sky above them changes from peach to prune to the deep, oceanic hue of the blue hour. At dinner, Tai takes the seat next to Eli, and the biting cold of the evening ebbs away. A raw and tender warmth convects in his chest when Eli smiles at him.

“Lastimosa,” he welcomes, drawing out each syllable.

Tai greets him. “Anderson.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Kudo, comment, whatever, you know what to do.


End file.
